The holiday season is upon us and America’s favorite feast, Thanksgiving, is finally here. It’s a day to reflect on what/who we are thankful for and to spend time with those we love. It’s also a day full of traditions, from the food on our plates to the football on our TV’s, and in Kansas City, the lights of the Plaza.
As with all holidays, most of us will have the day off to spend with relatives. Regardless of your plans, I’ve compiled a few key elements to maximizing your Thanksgiving in 2016.
SMOKE THAT BIRD
Turkey is an essential of any Thanksgiving bash but make sure you get a word in to your parents or in-laws about making sure to smoke the bird, rather than the more traditional baking option. This makes for a much moister and delicious taste. Most baked turkey is just a little too dry and usually, has to be salvaged by drowning it in gravy. If your fam doesn’t have a smoker, no need to worry. Several places in the area will do the dirty work for you for a small fee (I highly recommend Arthur Bryant’s). Just drop off your bird and come pick up 24-48 later, you will not regret it.
FEAST WITH A PLAN
Gorging on food has become synonymous with Thanksgiving. Whether it’s turkey, stuffing, pumpkin pie, or any of the other fleet of items, this holiday has become America’s cheat day. With the wide array of items, one might think that diving in and shoving as much food down one’s stomach is the way to go, but I’ve bowed out early of too many Thanksgiving meals with this approach. If you want to maximize food intake, you need to come in with a plan. Everyone is different, but the most efficient game plan I’ve used thus far is to spread out your intake throughout the day. Rather than having one enormous meal, have three decent sized meals over the course of the afternoon. Inter splice a nap between each one and you’ll be in for your most relaxing and comfortably full Thanksgiving yet.
GET WIFI PASSWORD AHEAD OF TIME
For those who don’t have unlimited data connecting to the wifi of anywhere we are going to be more than fifteen minutes is essential. Last year, through a few of the people I follow on Twitter, I came across this gem on Thanksgiving morning…
It couldn’t be truer in my case and so many others. Dad’s rarely change the factory wifi password, and it’s usually written on a tiny sticky note somewhere they can’t remember. Give your pop a call and have him start looking for it today, that way it’s ready for you as soon as you get there come Thanksgiving day.
POLITICAL TALK ESCAPE PLAN
We have never had a more discussed or polarizing election, and you better believe somebody in the fam is chomping at the bit to give their hot take. This might be the last thing on earth that you and others from you family want to talk about, so plan an escape route ahead of time. For starters, just try and change the subject. Think of a few topics that might rouse interest from the crowd. If that fails, talk to a few of your family members who are of age about turning it into a drinking game. Anytime someone says the words, Trump, Benghazi, emails, Hillary, Billy Bush, or the names of any of Trump’s appointed staff, take a drink.
BRING YOUR OWN TUPPERWARE FOR LEFTOVERS
Do not, I repeat, do not take the risk of bamboozling yourself out of leftovers because there is no Tupperware for you to use at the party. Come locked and loaded with your Tupperware so that when Grandma, Mom, Mother-in-law, or you Auntie asks if you want to take leftovers home, you can reply with an emphatic, HELL YEA, I DO!